Grease Monkey Woden:

I went out for dinner last night. The plan was for Ramen.
Unfortunately, it was closed….so we opted for plan B.
B for burger.

We chose a upmarket burger joint and I settled in for a ginger beer and a vegan burger. With chips.
$28 AUD for the burger. Wow.
It had better be good.

Narrator: It was not good. It was a soggy, pulpy, mushy, fall-apart mess, with a vegan patty that tasted like microwaved styrofoam. The whole catastrophe delivered to the table with the seismic abruptness of someone who obviously had infinitely more pressing things to be doing with their time.

Well. The chips were pretty good. But they failed to compensate for the 28-buck mushy styro in a disintegrate-on-touch bun.

I left yearning for a large bowl of steaming ramen.